


Tactile

by murdergatsby



Series: Eunoia [4]
Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Asexual Positivity, Asexual Will, Asexuality, Chiyoh (references), Crying, Cuddling, Demisexual Will, Established Relationship, Fluff, Foot Massage, Hannibal Takes Consent Very Seriously, Injury Recovery, Internalized Acephobia, Kissing, Kissing Cheeks, Kissing Necks, Kissing Tears, Living on a Boat, Love Confessions, M/M, Romance Without Sex, Sensuality Without Sex, Sex Indifferent Hannibal, Touch Positive, Touch Sensitive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-10 05:33:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7832314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/murdergatsby/pseuds/murdergatsby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will wants to be able to give Hannibal what he wants. Hannibal only wants what Will is willing to give him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tactile

**Author's Note:**

> This is my submission for the [Hannigram Acethetic's #StandByMe](https://twitter.com/aceofhannigram), a fest with intention to bring attention to asexual and aromantic orientations!
> 
> I've always HCd Will as being demisexual, or something similar to it, and this has been something I've wanted to write about for awhile (huge thank you to the fest for pushing me to do it!). Being on both spectrums myself, and being someone who enjoys being in intimate/bonded relationships (as well as writing about them), this was something very nice and uplifting to write about.
> 
> Note: I believe that Will is to the point of his emotional bond with Hannibal that sexual attraction may already be something he experiences to him, but for this I've written that he doesn't. _Will is not sexually attracted to Hannibal, but he does love him._
> 
> I hope you enjoy :)

This was only the third morning Hannibal had been able to get out of bed since the fall. He felt rejuvenated, reborn. His body still had the occasional aches from battle but now that he was able to monitor and administer his own medications (as well as Will’s) he knew he wasn’t far from total recovery.

Chiyoh had taken care to stock the boat with everything Hannibal had requested of her. He didn’t have long to contact her between the times Will had allowed him to escape and when The Dragon attacked them, but she had followed every rushed word to perfection.

She had gathered up all the pain medication, antibiotics, and other miscellaneous medical items she was able to get her hands on in such short notice. They had dehydrated foods that could last them months, as well as equipment for fishing when Will was feeling ready.

_Atta girl._

The ~~boat~~ yacht had been purchased long before Hannibal’s incarceration, and stored away where he knew those who obtained him would never find it. He had purchased it for reasons that were now so far in the past he hardly cared to resurface them, and regretted it for reasons that no longer mattered.

When Hannibal had contacted Chiyoh, his confidence that Will would join him on his escape was brittle. He was sure that Will would either come with him, or kill him. Neither felt true enough to fully believe, but one felt true enough to risk the other. Even when they fell, Hannibal wasn’t sure which route Will had chosen for them.

But it was Will that resuscitated him on the shore. It was Will that helped him on to the boat, and it was Will that cared for him after Chiyoh went her separate way. This was his and Will’s boat, as it was always meant to be.

_Will wants to be with me._

When Will came out to join Hannibal on the couch-similar seating that he had claimed for his afternoon viewing of the horizon, there was no hesitation to his intrusion.

As if summoned by Hannibal’s train of thought, Will wandered on to the deck wrapped at the shoulders in a plush blanket. He sat down beside him and covered both of their laps with it. He cupped his hands in his own lap and fought the urge to rest down into Hannibal’s shoulder. He looked out to the same view Hannibal was taking in, and Hannibal turned to watch Will instead.

Will’s eyes darted in Hannibal’s direction, feeling his gaze. He smirked in a shy manner that neither of them had expected, looking down at his own knees.

“What?” He asked.

Hannibal beamed at him, taking a while to speak and instead studying the creases that formed around Will’s lips and eyes as he smiled. “I am trying to decide whether or not you are actually cold this often, or if you are just attempting to invite me to wrap up with you.” He explained. He brought one of his hands to Will’s knees and rested it there without intention.  

Will brought his eyes to Hannibal’s slowly. He looked him up from where his hand touched him, to his arms, pausing longer than he intended on the muscular structure of his neck, before finally settling on his face. He let his own hand rest on top of Hannibal’s, raking his nails over the back of his palm before turning him and entwining his fingers in his grasp.

“Would it be so wrong if I were to say it was both?” Will answered. He gently squeezed at Hannibal’s hand and watched the corners of his already-grinning-mouth flick upwards.

Hannibal loved the honesty and the emotional warmth Will’s touch brought him.

“No.” He said. “But I have medical concerns about you being cold this often. It could be from the medication I’ve put you on, but it just as easily be something more serious.”

Will groaned playfully and rolled his eyes. “I’m fine.”

Will was acting more and more like himself every day. He was no longer tiptoeing around Hannibal like he was a ticking bomb and he was no longer softening his words as if he feared they might hurt to speak them. All his apprehension seemed to have disappeared as he allowed himself to settle into their future together, and the fact that it was _their_ future together.

_I love being with him._

“May I rub your feet?” Hannibal asked.

Will’s eyebrows arched in the way they did when he was judging someone. The question felt sudden but still reserved the calm and cold sound Hannibal’s voice nearly always held when he had questions. Will knew that tone meant Hannibal was trying too bury something.

“To stimulate circulation.” Hannibal continued by the prompt of Will’s confusion. This sounded less calm and cold, enough for Will to allow it.

He sat back against the cushions of the seat, letting his hand trail up Hannibal’s arm as he moved. He studied Hannibal’s expression with his eyebrows still arched, before humming his approval.

Hannibal guided him back until he was lying down flat, lifting his feet into his lap and removing his socks. Will felt immense uneasiness about this, but the moment Hannibal’s hands took hold of his bare feet he felt a comfort sweep over him.

Hannibal’s grip was hostile but kind, much like the rest of him. He brought one hand down over the bridge of Will’s foot, bending his toes until they cracked into a proper alignment. He rolled the knuckles of his other hand against Will’s instep until he could feel the tendons relaxing against them. It felt good, and the longer Will let it go on without speaking, the more he could feel a stinging tightness build beneath his eyes. When he felt a lump form in his throat, and knew he needed a distraction.

Will let himself resume his watch of the horizon. The top half of the sky was slate in color, broken by a line of snow white clouds. The sun sat in the middle of it all, warming Will’s face as it cast down on him. The heat was muted by the temperature of the sea as it sprayed salty flecks on-board. He could feel the wind tussling the hair and beard he’d been accidentally growing, in the same way it tussled the hull of the boat.

Then his focus shifted back to the way Hannibal was touching him, and the tightness returned.

 “I’m...” He murmured. The sound slipped from him on accident, and then choked him. The overwhelming feeling made him clamp down against his own teeth. “Fuck, I’m going to cry.”

Hannibal grinned and laughed to himself. “That can also be a side effect of the medication.” He explained. He continued to rub Will’s foot but lessened his grip just a fraction, the slightest worry that he could be hurting him crossing his mind.

Will shook his head and sat up on his elbows. “It can also be side effect of intense emotion, Hannibal.” Will said.

It was a dry statement, but Hannibal sensed there were more to it. He paused and released Will’s foot from his grasp completely. A few strands of Hannibal’s hair fell into his face and framed his cheekbones as he waited for Will to continue.

Hannibal had kept his beard in-check with a razor he had found on-board, but his hair was getting long. It had taken on a sun-washed silver and hung in uneven chunks do to his past “prison cut.” Will wondered if it bothered him, but _cute_ was definitely the word Will was adopting to describe Hannibal’s slightly rugged (for Hannibal) look.

He loved it.

Will wasn’t sure what more he wanted to say. He certainly didn’t have anything prepared, but when Hannibal’s lips gestured upwards in a welcome, patient, and inviting smile, Will had no choice but to let himself come undone.

 Again, his mouth made a quiet gasping sound that came across the ear as English words. _“This is just so nice.”_

Then, Will started to laugh.

“I can’t stay _warm_ , I can hardly _lift_ my arm.” Will ranted. He pressed the back of his hand to his forehead and continued to laugh through his points, at the ridiculousness he knew his statement had carried with it.

“Sometimes I wake up and feels as if someone has _gnawed through_ half of my face.” He gestured to the cut in his cheek as he spoke, adding the emphasis he felt it needed.

Will inhaled deeply, pausing suddenly as if he knew he was getting lost in himself. This _was_ a side effect of the pain killers he knew well, and he was becoming an expert at taming his wild-running mouth and mind. He looked straight on to Hannibal’s face and mirrored his polite smile. “And I feel better than I ever have…in my entire life.”

Hannibal was watching Will’s movements and listening to Will’s words as if he may be tested on it later- as he always did. Will gave Hannibal an opportunity to speak, but Hannibal knew he wasn’t done. There has a point to Will’s outburst that Hannibal could see forming at the tip of his tongue- A point he had longed for Will to make since he come-to on this boat, and even more so since Will had crawled into his bed and first kissed him.

Will could feel the tears building in his eyes again so he found more words to spit out, interrupting his self-created silence.

“It’s so nice to…be with you.”

Hannibal’s tongue darted over his lips, but he didn’t change his expression otherwise. He felt up the underside of Will’s calf and moved his legs just enough so that he fit between them.

He leaned over and kissed Will slowly as his official response.

It wasn’t exactly what he wanted to hear but it was good to hear, and he could wait longer if he needed to.

Will gripped at end of Hannibal’s shirt, pulling on him and coaxing him to kiss him deeper. Hannibal obliged. Much like everything else, kissing had become easier for both of them. Will used to scrounge for reasons to kiss Hannibal, and Hannibal used to wait on spoken invitation to kiss Will. Now they were at a point where Hannibal knew he could always kiss him, and Will knew he never needed a reason to want to.

Hannibal cupped his jaw, and guided him back against the base of the seat once more. His tongue brushed against Will’s teeth and Will accepted him with a pleased moan. He relaxed his thighs so that Hannibal could fall between them fully, and Hannibal obliged.

Hannibal kissed away from Will’s mouth, on to his jaw, and again Will brought his attention back to the horizon. He focused on all the colors the individual sunbeams made as the broke the sky, and breathed deeply.

 _This is such a blissful moment of time._ He thought. _Hannibal might like to have sex right now._

With the beauty of the scenery, Hannibal would probably like to make them art of the same caliber. The comfortability that their relationship had settled into, and the pleasant taboo Will understood that having sex on the exposed deck of a boat had (even if no one was around to see them) …Hannibal would likely _love_ this.

He let Hannibal kiss down his throat and nip at the bones of his collar. Felt up Hannibal’s rib-cage to encourage him to continue, while he considered this thought. His heart had started to race and he wondered if Hannibal could feel it with his lips. The smirk that silently grew against his skin told him that this was the case.

He liked this. He liked the kissing. He liked having Hannibal’s lips on his body, and to be caged beneath him like this. It made him feel safe, complete, and _wanted_ \- all things he was surprised with how badly he needed since their fall into the sea. Being kissed by Hannibal brought a power to Will that, had he known he could find within his lips, he would have stop fighting _this_ years ago.

_But, sex…_

Will didn’t _dislike_ sex. It was more of a lack-in-interest than anything else. Occasionally it was something that he liked to partake in, but it wasn’t something he searched for, or asked for, or _needed_. It wasn’t a concept he often stumbled upon on his own, as something you do with a significant other, and more often than not it was a reason that some past relationships never worked out.

He never was sure when to act the sexual urges he never had, because he didn’t have them to act on. Too often that translated as a disinterest in the person, which wasn’t at all true in the case with Hannibal.

Will had had sex with people that meant less than Hannibal before. It was a compromise he often made with partners in the past, and it was a compromise he wanted to make for Hannibal. _Because, sex is what people do with someone when they love each other._

Will swept his hands up and under Hannibal’s shirt. He felt the heat of the skin on his back and pulled against him, encouraging him to move his hips. He lifted his own and tightened his thighs around him. Hannibal sighed happily in response and allowed Will’s hands to guide him where he wanted him. He moved again to kiss his lips, smiling into it in a way that followed Will’s own smile.

“Will.” Hannibal said, with a growl so soft it sounded more akin to a purr. He slipped his hand between Will and the seat, pushing against the small of his back and lifting his body up to meet him.

The shy smile from before was back on Will’s face as he braced his body against Hannibal’s. Hannibal forced Will to look back up at him and planted a firm but dry kiss on his lips. Then, Hannibal rolled on to his back, staying between Will’s legs and rested himself back on Will’s chest.

Will moved his hands from Hannibal’s body naturally, but Hannibal repositioned them over his own chest. He closed his eyes and took simple delight in being held by Will, even if it was under his own leadership.

For the third time, Will’s mouth acted on its own accord and issued a small “Oh?” into the world. High inflection on the question-mark.

Hannibal hummed in response, tilting his head back in a curious gesture at Will.

Will looked back at him with an unintentionally slack jaw. “It’s just…” Will began. He felt emotional weight grow on him, and his heart-rate began to slow. He thought about letting it go, and letting this conversation happen at a later time in a later place. He thought that maybe he’d never have to deal with the conversation, and that he could put it off until he was ready.

_Or at least, more ready._

“This isn’t where I was expecting this to go.” Will said, defiant of his own ideas.

Hannibal shifted in Will arms and leaned into him deeper. “Would you have liked it to go elsewhere?”

Will laid his cheek on top of Hannibal’s head and sighed.

Hannibal continued, at the absence of Will’s verbal response. “You have never approached me with sexual desire before, Will.” He said. “And I have never expected that to change.”

Will snorted. “I’m sure you want it to change, though.”

Hannibal blinked slowly, adjusting to the harshness of Will’s words. Will felt immediate embarrassment from the way he said it, and tried to fix it while burring his face further into Hannibal’s hair.  

“You’re a sexual person.”

Hannibal moved in Will’s arms again, this time to face him. “Sensual.” He said. He comfortably applied himself to a push-up stance over Will, letting his hair fall into his face. “Tactile.” He added, continuing to correct Will’s claim. He let his fingers loose in the wild strands of Will’s hair, brushing it out between his knuckles. “I like to experience, and I like to touch. And you seem to like it when I touch you.”

Will shifted beneath him, and considered this. He did love it when Hannibal touched him. He always had, even from the very beginning of their “friendship.” Even in the middle bits where everything was built on lies and manipulation. A brush of Hannibal’s fingertips brought a comfort to him he couldn’t describe any other way than the feeling of _home._ He hadn’t understood it back then, but he understood it now.

“That’s enough for me.” Hannibal finished his claim. He lowered himself until his lips were hovering above Will’s. Will knew he wouldn’t be able to move his own without getting caught up in them.

Will smiled up at him, nervously rolling his lips over his teeth. He didn’t look fully convinced, so Hannibal sighed. He dropped his head into Will’s collar and fought to not kiss him again, figuring that would be out of place right now. He didn’t want to push it.

“Sex and romance have very little do with each other, other than the fact they sometimes go together.” Hannibal explained. He let his fingers leave Will’s hair, and brushed his thumb over Will’s cheek, careful not to apply too much pressure to his scar. “You don’t _need_ one to have the other.”

Tears welled in Will’s eyes instantaneously. Suddenly, Will felt bad for even thinking Hannibal would make him have sex with him from his own selfish want. Hannibal could have taken him anytime he pleased in the past, especially when they had first met. Especially when he was vulnerable and sick, and would have let Hannibal take anything he wanted from him.

_He waited this long just to kiss you._

Hannibal waited until Will was strong enough to deny him. Hannibal waited until Will _wanted_ to kiss him _._ _Of course this is enough for him._

Hannibal lifted his head as he felt Will’s tears roll from his face and on to his own skin. “You are crying.” He observed.

Will crinkled his nose and shook his head, sarcastically denying the obvious fact. Hannibal ignored him and kissed at Will’s cheekbones, cleaning away the tears with the plush of his lips. Will wondered what his tears tasted like to Hannibal.

“I love you.” Will said, over the quiet kiss sound that came from Hannibal’s lips pulling off his cheek. He wanted to say it, and he meant it, but in minuscule amount of time that Hannibal took to respond it started to feel like he was breaking.

Hannibal’s lips stayed hovering over him. He was stuck- stunned by what Will had just admitted. He pulled his head back so that he could look Will in the eye. Will’s gaze didn’t shy from his. Will didn’t pull away.

“I love you.” Hannibal said, with his own inflection branding it as his own statement- not a copy of Will’s. “I love you, Will.”

Will brought his hand up and swept the falling strands of Hannibal’s hair up and behind his ears. He pulled Hannibal down into his chest, forcing Hannibal’s head rest back there. It wasn’t much of a fight.

Will could feel damp patches growing on his shirt where Hannibal’s eyes touched, and he couldn’t help but poke at him once more.

“That’s probably just a side effect of the medication.” He teased.

Hannibal laughed, but only laughed. He felt more preoccupied with the sound of Will’s steady heartbeat. He fantasized about composing something to it, as they both turned their attention back to the grounding horizon.

**Author's Note:**

> Just somethings I wanted to note before you go:
> 
> 1\. I don't find anything wrong with being ace and still having sex with your S/O (or any person, for that matter), for whatever reasons you wish to. I just wanted to write something where an non-asexual person was willing to _not_ have sex with their asexual partner. I mean no disrespect to those in the ace community who enjoy sex! This is just what I wanted to write about.
> 
> 2\. In case it wasn't clear: _"Because, sex is what people do with someone when they love each other."_ is a very negative/toxic thought. Sex is what people do when they want to have sex. What two people who love each other do is up to them. Sometimes they go together, and sometimes they don't. And all of that is okay.


End file.
